Distressing Post Apocalyptic Clothing for Cosplay and LARP

   

 There are many ways to distress clothing for post apocalyptic cosplay.  In this blog,  I'm going to give you a quick run down of common techniques, and share my favorite secret technique for getting that well worn, dystopian look.  Many of these tips have come from across the web, the last one is my own personal discovery.

    Distressing with Bleach

Using a spray bottle,  and a 50/50 mixture of bleach and water, randomly spritz different areas gently from above, and from the side. Typically, sweat will bleach out clothing over time, so, pay further attention to areas such as the neckline and armpits of any shirts, and backs of knees on pants. Allow bleach to set for at LEAST one hour. Wash thoroughly with detergent and water before proceeding.

    Distressing with Blades

 

A serrated blade, dragged forcefully sideways across fabric can create wear and tear quickly. Again, randomly choose areas for distressing, and scrape away! This part is fun if you're using clothing left behind by one of your exes, because you can express built up aggression! Using any sharp object or knife,  stab holes into the fabric. Larger slices can be resewn to give a long-owned look.

     Distressing with Blood

No Human Sacrifice Required! Fake blood is easy to make on your own. Karo Corn Syrup, water, and red food coloring make a fairly realistic blend, while store bought fake blood, or even paints could also be used. Just remember, dried blood is a dark color, not bright red!

     Distressing with Dyes

 

Personally, my favorite products with which to dye and age clothing (as well as other materials) are Antiquing Solutions by Tsukineko. Many other methods can be used in place of these products, such as any brown and red brown ink or dye, coffee, and even tea!  Spray bottles are a great method to apply dyes but dipping bottom corners and various places directly into dyes is also a great idea and gives a truly swamped look.

     Distressing with Acid

 

While I'm sure others have probably stumbled across their own unique ways to distress with acids, I accidentally discovered my favorite method/step in distressing post apocalyptic clothing items while fixing my toilet! I used Liquid Lightning Drain Cleaner, containing sulfuric acid. It is INCREDIBLY important to wear gloves, and keep it on the clothing you are trying to distress ONLY, it will eat holes in anything you drip even a drop on. Small amounts have big effects with this method, so use sparingly! Dipping a fork into a small amount of the substance can yield minor drips perfect for this. I have yet to try a spray bottle with this substance, however. Although listed last, this would ideally be step one. It is also important only to wash this substance off in either a bathtub, sink, or yard, because you definitely do not want any residue from it lingering in your clothes washer and dryer!

Happy hunting, see you in the Fall!

Simple Cyber Punk and Post Apocalyptic Cosplay Prop Weapons Idea

      Cyber Punk, Steam Punk, Post Apocalyptic, Atom Punk and Diesel Punk Squirt Gun Altering

You've got the perfect costume, now all you need is a cool weapon to fit your favorite aesthetic! I've got a couple of diy techniques and ideas for you to try that don't involve a lot of foam, which lets face it, foam gives an incredible look, but execution of such projects isn't a likelihood for everyone, like me.

      Paint an existing squirt gun

I know it doesn't sound like the most original idea, but there are SO MANY different squirt guns and so many different paint effects you could apply, that the possibilities are ENDLESS. 

Steampunk Style Phaser Weapon

Post apocalyptic style weapons, with rust and aging effects

       Alter an existing squirt gun

This idea relieves you of the stress of having to create a base, while maximizing the possibilities for your weapon creativity. Depending on which materials you have, and what you can manufacture, you can come up with some seriously unique killing machines.

This ray gun features a painted rubber vape stand as a flared barrel on the front of the gun, a working compass, some tubing, a jar of green goo (Victorian battery), and a bubble wand as a sight.

This painted water gun features an unaltered base, metallic paint scheme, and a faux patina effect.

It's pretty simple, and all you need is a squirt gun, and some paint. Added supplies are nice and help to make more complicated and otherworldly weapons, but even if all you do is paint an existing water gun, you can still achieve some pretty cool additions to your cosplay get ups.

When choosing how to distress your weapon it really depends on what type of conditions your character would live in. How old is the weapon? does it exist in a dry climate, or a wet one? maybe it is exposed to chemicals frequently. Is it covered in blood? What powers it? These are all important questions to ask yourself while creating your weapon.

How To Get FREE Make Up!

   

     Your wallet is probably in disagreement with your face on how much make up you want or need. In today's economy, personally, I'm on your wallet's side! Your face doesn't even need make up, you've got a lot of glow naturally!
     But your inner artist needs room to breathe! How can anyone just not use their talents? Your face was a work of art before you start, but once you've finished, by golly, it's a masterpiece!
      Just in case you want to wear more makeup than you can afford, (you're not broke, it's just so danged expensive!) I've got a method to get you as much war paint as you need.

     Put on your boots

You probably didn't realize that your quest for beauty was going to end up with you in a dumpster, but here we are.
     Most corporate stores throw out a LOT of product. You wouldn't believe the reasoning behind this! Why couldn't they just throw a discount sticker on it and let us bask in the affordability? Your favorite stores to buy make up probably throw a lot of brands you love away all the time! Of that cheap mascara has you looking like a raccoon, get your paws rummaging through dumpsters ASAP! I'm not saying you should do this if you can afford makeup, but who can afford make up in this econony, anyway??
    Dumpster Diving for Divas

1.Don't make a mess! You'll render your secret make up dumpster useless if you do, they'll lock that sucker up if they think they need to, do so yourself and the employees a favor, and clean up after yourselves.

2. Go at night. Shopping while the store is open might be tempting, resist the urge!

3. Bring a friend. A seasoned diver may not think they need an escort, but there's nothing worse than getting caught stuck in a dumpster.

4. Pallets aren't just what you're looking for, they're ladders. Shipping pallets can be useful to get into and out of dumpsters with.

5. I was NOT kidding about the boots. You're going to need sensible clothing and footwear for this mission. The last thing you want to do is jump into a dumpster and accidentally ruin your cute shoes. Flowing, loose clothing is a big no-no as well. You want to wear darker colors without looking too much like a full on robber.

6. Bring a bag! Although you can usually find bags in the dumpster, you don't want to count on it. You're going to need a place to carry all your great scores!


Happy hunting, folks!
   

How Traveling On Foot Made My Faith Stronger

  

        Faith on the Road

  I've spent the better part of my life as a backpacker, hitch hiking across the United States. I've attended a large number of Rainbow Gatherings, and worked countless small jobs along the way. While at times, I experienced symptoms of homelessness, other times, I experienced things that cannot be bought.    I would not trade my travels for anything.

     I, along with many friends I met along the way, went through intense personal growths during our time traveling and i honestly can't tell you that I would be who I am today had I not spent that time on the road. I volunteered with traveling free food kitchens, I worked for a Gator Farm. Ive climbed too many mountains to count or name. During all that time, for the most part, I kept my faith.

   
      I as well as anyone will tell you that Christianity itself is downright criminal. Responsible for some of the largest massacres in all of history, Christianity as an institution is full on offensive. But this does not mean that I don't believe. I believe in many things.  I believe in today, I believe remotely in tomorrow. I believe in myself, and right now. And most importantly and in relevance to the title, I believe I'll make it ok, and that I've had some serious help along the way. some of this help came from people, and some, from unseen forces that i would be condemned as a crazy woman forever if I gave much time explaining.

                             
  
     Sometimes, you just suddenly know something without knowing. Sometimes, exactly what you need to happen happens just as you're getting ready to think of it. The moments of serendipity were frequent on the road, and it's almost impossible not to believe in something greater than yourself when you're out there, no matter how you choose to define it.

   

    I've found hundreds of bananas, or a 100 dollar bill. I've found friends under bridges, and in high rise condos. I've woken up next to the highway to the most incredible views and I can't help but think that the entire time, I was exactly where I was supposed to be each moment. When i stopped overthinking things, everything i needed came easily and i rarely wanted for anything for long.

      Now that I'm back in a home, raising my family, I need to remember this effortlessness with which my life used to flow, as I'm certain it can still, so long as I don't get in it's way.

When You're Angry With Christians (And You Have Every Right To Be)

    First off, I find it necessary to note, that I AM a believer. However....
   
    After the first time I got exorcised, I became angry with God. Very angry. with all we had gone through in our relationship, I couldn't believe this was happening. Here I was, in His house, being called a thief, and a prostitute, by His people. After I had kept Him so close, for so long, in the darkest of places? I felt a sense of utter betrayal.
    By the SECOND time i got exorcised, I was beyond livid! There was no way any God that knew me would say any of these things to these people! "We exorcise the demon of theft out of this young woman!" "we exorcise the demon of prostitution out of this young woman!" It hurt. There is no ego wounded so badly as in the case of such a God smack.
     I was none of what the church kept accusing me of. Those churches did not know me. I was new there, or a random passerby. The THIRD time someone attempted to pull me into an exorcism, I was hip to the jive, and did not allow it. He thought it would cure my schizophrenia....
     This was the final straw, and what would inevitably lead me to conclude that God, Himself, did none of this. God did not tell His people bad things about me. They were just zealots, hopped up on a good book and maybe a little too much free will. What God HAD done, was created me. he created me, and schizophrenia and he gave that to me as a gift I would only begin to unwrap at exactly that point in my life. If I weren't meant to be, I wouldn't, and i cannot allow some misguided church people lead me to believe otherwise. Not even for a moment.
    Fast forward to the present day. It's been several years since anyone had any plans to vacate demons from my body. And it's gotten to the point where, God and I? Back to being homies. The church? Well, it can pretty much leave me alone. After lighting some of my ancestors on fire for being herbalists and midwives, I should have known it wouldn't be all that much better in the modern age.
     If you happen to be christian, please understand, I'm probably not angry with you, so much as the institutions you may uphold. I'm maybe a little disgusted. People leave catholic schools hating God, and it takes a special kind of evil to get someone to hate Him. I still pray, but I don't want to pray with anyone else. And so I only find fellowship occasionally. I avoid services. I avoid groups of Christians.
     As Christians, I think this is symbolic of unattended responsibilities to learn to accept those with mental illness as His creation. We see a "problem" and we want God to solve it for us. But, what if God saw a different problem first, and this thing we don't want to see for the challenge that it is, IS the solution to that problem?  What if we are flaking on God when we ask Him to do away with our tests?
     If you're angry with Christianity, I totally get it. The list of crimes keeps being added to. Crusades, Spanish Inquisition, Witch Hunts, Genocide.....
     If you Are a Christian, I sort of get that, too. Maybe they've never exorcised you, you like not feeling cast out. The moment you're the one they start throwing stones at, things tend to change. Please do not allow your groups to continue this madness. IT IS OK to defy the church. Jesus chased people with a whip in one. IT IS OK to call out your fellowship when something is not right. And it may just be your test.

Returning to the Light

So I Finally Attended A Webinar, And Here's What Happened

     Just in case your propensity for B.S. disallows you the experience, I have martyred myself by attending a webinar for small handcrafted business for you. Rest assured, you're probably not missing all that much. Below, we will explore some of the bogus tips I was given, and why they most likely won't work for artists, or possibly anyone.

      Automate your small business:
Well, this may be possible if you're making bath bombs, or something with some level of uniformity, but it won't work for artists! You cannot outsource your art. You can reach someone else how to make production-quality knock offs of your work, but it'll never quite be YOUR work. There are plenty of jobs to hire out when it comes to your business, but if you create one of a kind pieces of art, I suggest you keep the hiring out to stuff like shipping and shopping.

      Stick to ONE THING.
To get noticed, to stand out, these small business gurus recommend making yourself the end all be all in just ONE arena. What? You want....artists.....to suppress their talents to appease you by focusing on one medium until they're bored? This is terrible advice for artists! True artists fiddle with multiple mediums every week! What if you haven't even found the medium that will allow you to reach true greatness, and you settle for good? No, artist friends, do NOT stick to ONE THING. Unless that one thing is your heart. Follow that bad birch everywhere.

      Assess the competition
How about no? As an artist, other artists are teachers more than they have ever been competition. Assess the market, sure. But keep any ideas about competition strictly to sports. This isn't a competition, and the only one you should be competing against is your former self. No one else can produce your art because no one else sees the world quite the same way you do. Eyes on your own paper, there, Jimmy.
     The market, however, watch all you want. Its good to be aware of trends and to use effective tags, but don't think of the art market as competing for sales. Other artists and sellers may be employing marketing strategies you could benefit from, but they are still not your adversaries.
   
   
      Attending a webinar could be enough to crush your spirit, but don't start restructuring your small business just yet! There are many paths to success, and you could be very close to yours and not even know it. While it's always good to keep learning new techniques to apply to your business strategy, it seems best at this stage to keep plugging away, and apply the techniques that feel right for you. Not being able to match strategies with one guru seller won't break your company, but cutting off what people genuinely love about it, might. If you're going to subscribe to any of these gurus out there, remember that not everything you try on I'd going to be a perfect fit, but when something does got for your startup, you'll know it! What fits your business best, is your passion for it.

Outsourcing God's Labor: Free Food on the Road

     My backpack weighed between 40-60 lbs. Wherever I found safe to sleep was typically about a mile away from any opportunities to make money or food. From the time I woke up every morning, to the time I go to sleep, and beyond, I was working. Fighting for my own survival. Some days were definitely easier than others, but there were no days off.

     Oddly enough, I found groups to volunteer with. Many of us do. I spent my days thinking of others and their needs, rather than just my own. Working with free food kitchens is awesome. It's emotionally rewarding, and it keeps you busy. It gave me community and family at all times, and gave me a purpose greater than my self. 

     While not all homeless people are hopped up on civic duty, it's surprising how many of us were. When our bus rolled in, you fawned over us, giving us everything we needed to feed your town and the next. But...why? Why did the homeless in your area need a fresh faced approachable mascot to donate to, when the need had been there the whole time?

     We are, as a species, lazy. Rather than take on the emotional and physical labor of solving problems ourselves, we outsource our problem solving to God. Here's the kicker, we were already given this job. Praying about it and walking away won't get it done. God isn't going to send superman to fix things for us. He sent us. We are his outsourced labor. 

     So why are we, as a society, leaving the task of crowd sourcing and distributing food security to those experiencing lack themselves? Why can't we, as a nation, be bothered to care in a way that doesn't leave such a deficit that homeless people are picking up the slack?

     So many people want so badly to believe that homeless people are homeless due to their own faults as a way to make us feel safe. So much so that society is projecting it's feelings of self on to the homeless. Victim blaming helps separate the masses from the ideation that it could be anyone. 

      But it doesn't do much else, to demonize victims of class warfare. It doesn't change anything to say that all homeless people are lazy, or on drugs. 

     I've visited a lot of makeshift housing communities, strung along the side of the highway. Many of the inhabitants work during the day, if they can. They make a home in the cluster of woods, with no real walls. They are going to sit down and eat a meal together tonight. Propane stoves when fire has been outlawed. Tarps where they are not permitted tents. 

     They are patriots. Carving out a life worth living where there was none. Fighting for every day freedoms we've all but forgotten we have. 

     And sure, some of them are on drugs. Or alcohol. Because this life has taken so much from them and left them with a hole no one and nothing can fill. A middle class woman in the suburbs somewhere is having a pharmacy for breakfast and no one cares. But a homeless person self medicated and suddenly it's a viable excuse to withhold resource? Yeah ok. 

     Some of my best friends are still or have been homeless. 

     Most of us didn't consider ourselves homeless, because we found homes on the road and with each other. We were at home doing God's work that society refused. Scraping together change to buy coffee cups so we could serve one another as equals.

     Every single day, each of us is given opportunities. Opportunities to change things, however slightly. We are each given chances to pick up some of the slack. Chances to shine, and to do His good work for Him. The question is what are you going to do with yours?


Loading excess gear on to the top of a bus

Writer riding one of these free food kitchen buses.

A coffee station while you wait for food

Bagged feminine hygiene products to give away

A feed we did in Kentucky

Chopping veggies for the soup in the back of the bus/kitchen

Self Doubt: Kick Its Butt!

     The biggest threat to your goals? SELF DOUBT! You'll never know how far you could have made it if you don't try! I know what it's like to feel low. I know what it's like to doubt in your abilities, or whether what you'd like to do is even for you.
     You've got this tho. You've made it this far, and if you keep going, your dedication is bound to pay off eventually. Sure, you might fail some along the way. It's a trial and error process. You'll make the discoveries of what DOES AND DOESN'T work for you!
      It isn't always easy to believe in yourself, or your methods, especially when what everyone tells you are suggestions that have already failed you, but that's just the thing, those methods failed YOU! You didn't fail them! Solutions are NOT one size fits all. There are as many ways to succeed as there are people in this world, and there's room for everyone on the 'Look, I Made It!' boat. Don't jump ship just yet. Keep sailing. You can do this.

https://youtu.be/Cj4W9wRHQY8

Social Media Networks Explained

     Are you confused by all these different social media sites, and how each one is used? Not sure which new network is right for you? Fret not, social padwan, we've got you covered with some helpful descriptions of the most popular social media sites, and what it'll take to make it on each one. (Nevermind the fact that I'm blogging because I've obviously failed, ok, the insight is 100% still valid!)
     Facebook: Your Grandmother's Social Media Network
     You are familiar with this one. Look up your friends, add them, and begin interacting immediately! No special gimmicks required.  It doesn't matter what you're into, there are at least a bazillion groups full of other people to talk to about it with. (Just remember though, your grandmother is watching).
     Snapchat: An Excuse To See Bewbs, with Filters
     Now I realize that many people probably use it in many ways, but the whole 'photo disappears 5 seconds after you've sent it's thing makes this the safest way to send your nudes. If you like to flaunt it, or just want to see your friends makes, this might be the app for you. How to schmooze your friends into sending you naughty pics once you've downloaded it tho, is up to you.
     This app is ALSO great if you've ever fantasized about being a dog, rabbit or deer, or if you have a thing for flower crowns and such. This network pairs well with cappuccino.

Twitter: Fighting With The Famous
     Do you live to argue? Do you often wish you give people a piece of your mind? Are you in a dependant relationship with your phone, and want to take out your aggression in famous people? Then Twitter for you, just may be a dream come true. If you're mildly funny, or extremely bored, this app might offer you a home on the web.

     Instagram: Pictures Mostly (with a side of T&A)
      This is a slightly more personal, or professional place, depending on how you use it, and it seems like a pretty even split. Whether you're posting pictures of your baby, or pictures of your latest products, the chances of people reading your text lowers dramatically. While that might make for a nicer atmosphere overall, with less fighting or trolls than you might find on Facebook, people might be mildly annoyed by memes here unless it's your original content. There are plenty of places for memes, this just doesn't seem to be one of them. Your half naked selfie, however? Practically belongs here amidst all of the other wannabe Instagram models.
     Tumblr: We Get It, You're Popular
     Honestly, I'm still stumped by this one. Done people have a lot of reblogs and 'notes' (likes and comments) and others, like myself, post only to hear crickets. If you happen to figure out how to actually engage with others in a way more substantial than spectatorship, let me know.
     Pinterest: Its More Like a Search Engine
     But for people that are too stubborn to use actual search engines. Like Tumblr, I haven't quite nailed putting myself out there on this app just yet. I've experienced more success than I have with Tumblr, however. Apparently, nobody wants to see anything less than a catalog quality photo here, and it's mostly for perfect shiny people. No poor resolution party pics to be found here, folks, it's all business. While you'll find a plethora of interesting project how-to's, whether or not you'll actually be able to pull them off, is another story entirely.
 

     These are the social media networks I've tried, some however recently. If you have comments about any of these, or some I may have left out, feel free to enrich my (and others') lives with your wisdom. I hope you found this mildly humorous, and maybe a little helpful even.

How I started a business without an ID or a bank account

   

     For whatever reason that you find yourself without an ID, don't lose hope! I started an online store with no ID, after having traveled across the country for most of my adult life. I had nothing left with my name on it, but I STILL managed, and I'm about to tell you exactly how I did it.

     Firstly, be who you're saying you are. This isn't some hack for scammers. You actually have to own your identity for this.

     Find ANY address that you have permission to get mail at. Drop ins work. Shelters work. Your friend's house, anywhere.

     Sign up for a Netspend MasterCard card online. You'll need your social security number for this, but you won't have to physically have your card. You'll just need to remember your ss number.
     Once you get your netspend card, you can open online accounts that require card information, like etsy, or a blog payment account. I realize that etsy is not the only way this could be of benefit. You won't need to have any money to open the netspend account either.
     After a few months, if you manage to make and receive money with whatever your hustle is into your netspend card, they'll upgrade you to an all access bank account.

     This is perfect for transferring money, accepting funds online, and it has your name on it, so places with lower security will take it as a form of ID of sorts when compiled with other things.
     
       That's IT. It was simple (although it did take me a while to discover how easy it was). I managed to do it while on the road. I could NOT have gotten anywhere had I not figured out this simple life hack. My life is exponentially better and I'm able to make money online now. Best of luck!

I'm now living as a somewhat successful artist with my children in Florida.the road was long, and it got hard towards the end. But I found a way to change my life for the better.

Who Takes Their Children to a Pride Fest, Anyway? We Do, And Here's Why

     Well, for starters, I did. And if you'd like to know why, I'll gladly tell you. It's because my children asked.
     My kids, 15, and 13, are gay. Very gay. I did not indoctrinate them into gayness, nor did they catch the condition at a Pride Fest. I'm not in the habit of being in and out of relationships, so perhaps I failed to indoctrinate them fully into straightness, but I honestly doubt it.
     They're gay, as many kids are. I'm lucky to have the kind of relationship with them that they trusted me with this information before any one else in our family. (They are no longer in any closets or I would NOT be sharing this information with you here in a blog.)
     I would NEVER in a million years miss an opportunity to support my kids, or how gay they are. I'm proud (no pun intended) of them for being so rigid in who they are in a world that often asks us to compromise ourselves. I'm proud of how assertive they are in their identities. I LOVED giving them the chance to see how VERY not alone they are.
     But also, for a moment, we represented something SO much more. Because so many members of the LGBTQA community are NOT accepted by their families, who gladly take them to Pride events. We represent a family so many aren't lucky enough to have. We represent a changing world, with so much love it misses no one, queer or otherwise. The world is all too often a cold and unforgiving place, but we don't have to be either of those things.
      Yes, I am that parent that takes their kids to family friendly Pride events. Yes, we are the loving home, living proof that they DO exist. Yes, they had a great time. And so did I.

Why I Won't Attend Your Webinar

     While it may be effective to market business models to baby boomers, and maybe even genXers, it doesn't seem like it'll work on Millenials. Because we see you as car salesmen of dreams.
      There's something inherently fishy in the whole scheme. Your success seems hindered upon my lack of it. If it worked so well for you to apply these techniques, great! But trying to earn yet another buck off of me, after you're already successful? Its total shit. How greedy can you be?
      "Send me 5 dollars and I'll send you my book on how to get rich!" Page one of book: put an ad in the paper that says send me 5 dollars and I'll send you my book on how to get rich. Yeah. You seem to be looking for suckers, it's not ethical. You're swindling people out of their money at that point.
     If Millenials ghosting employers is any indication, this generation values ethically sound investments of their time and money.
      I'm leery about having to give my email address for a webinar. Why is the content not just in YouTube? Plenty of people monetize their videos and make money off of it, but no. You've got to sell my email address, too? I don't think so, pal. If anyone is going to be profiting off of me, why isn't it ME?

     I'm not going to buy into your weird finances book cult. I'm not going to your webinar even if you said it's free because I am aware of the unseen costs of things and I see right through what you're doing. I value transparency. Not shady and confusing antics of people desperately trying to make a buck so They can afford their second home or new car payments.